Monday 23 November 2015

Gazzetta Dello Sport - Special Italian Edition


TOP ITALIAN FOOTBALL PUNDIT: Gino Kinnearo (cousin of Gordon) has taken the time to give his opinion on some of the Italian based managers and has given an overview of his opinion on their individual performances so far this season with specific ratings matched to each manager!


Beddows (Milan): 


I have been so impressed with Beddows, absolute quality appointment, 3 wins on the bounce the greatest winning run in Milan history, he has brought the prodigal son, Balotelli home. Balotelli is a player of such class that he makes walking on water look easier than Jesus and it has been said that Balotelli feed 10000 with two loaves and two fishes… Legend. Beddows has more angels signing for him on a daily basis than Blatter has euros in his bank account!

RATING 10/10

DP (Juventus): 

I like DP, but he is doing a shit job at Juventus, but if DP thinks he can one day bring the title to Turin then he is more deluded than Hirst’s wife when he takes her on a night out and she gets all done up expecting fireworks and they walk past a posh restaurant and end up in Mcdonalds! Big Mac and Fries for Mrs Hirst… Deluded idiot!

RATING 4/10

Hirst (Genoa)

“Everybody loves Hirst PMW said…” Bullshit! Hirst bums everyone, how do you think he got Sergi Roberto? How do you think with a squad lack that they’ve reached a cup final? Cheating that’s how! Hirst is more bent that Darren! He does more back handed deals per day than Roy Keane walks his dog. If he goes up to Div 3 it will be a total outrage!

RATING 3/10

PMW (Inter)

Class, suave and model… 3 words recently used to describe PMW by Nuts Magazine… What totally crap! Week by week as the pressure is building PMW keeps coming up with excuses for his failure as a manager, more excuses than Sterling has snakes…. “ssssssss”. All those excuses aside he is more of a playboy than a manager, he cares more about his Gucci and Versace, spends more time shopping than at the training ground and he wonders why the team are struggling, he is more blind than Stevie Wonder. I’d advise him to look in the mirror if he could see through the façade he’s created.

RATING 1/10

Malcolm (Fiorentina)

Malcolm is so old and blinded by his supposed wisdom that he can’t even see that Roncaglia is shit… yet he persists in playing him… Even my great granny could see he is useless, and she’s been dead 25 years! Malcolm is a fucking joke, if he were in that ITV gameshow the fans would say “Get him out of here!”

RATING 3/10

Harmer (Sampdoria)

Gav Harmer, or should it be Harmful! He should have been kept at arm’s length from Sampdora, he has done more damage to that squad and the morale of the players and fans than the Dali Lama’s return would do to the Chinese psyche! Drogba and Lampard have been spotted being escorted to games in Popemobiles for example, there is wrapping your ‘best’ players in cotton wool but his methods of preparation are more out of place than Hirst would be in a top job! Disgraceful.

RATING 2/10  

Hudson (Torino)

Huddo – a descendant of convicts, kangaroos and koalas – he is crazy, he bounces on about how his team is as good as DP’s Juventus and how happy he is with mid-table mediocrity – his back line have got about as much pace and stamina as Del Boy’s Robin Reliant! He another one who if on X Factor would have not been allowed to try-outs due to his over inflated ego not fitting through the door!

RATING 4/10

Cass (Atalanta)

Manager of the quarter – well he has been failure of the quarter since reaching those dizzy heights so long ago. How do you lose to Shipp’s Malaga! The people of Bergamo have been quietly calling for his head for a while now, they want changes, in fact some say Cass’ head is as in more danger than that of Charles I… “Off with his head” were the chants from the traveling support in Italy last night.

RATING 5/10

Top 100 Italian based manager rating's - some manager declined to give a photo

1 comment:

  1. Disclaimer: Gino Kinnearo is of no relation to the real Gordon 'Gino' Kinnear, just ask Stefano Beddowo (cousin to Stephen Beddows) and he will confirm that Gino Kinnearo is locked away in a psychiatrico ward in Sicily and is not even allowed a crayon.

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